onemindfulself

Advice

Advice

How it works

Type in the text box below anything you need advice on and press submit! One of our admin will get back to you as soon as possible! Everything shared will be kept anonymous! Check the box if you would like to be emailed when you get an answer! We will send a follow up email if you would like to share the answer given to you! It will be with the others on the bottom of this page, everything anonymous of course!

Community Answers

"I have a big test coming up and I don't know what to do. I don't have motivation to study for it. I know that if I don't study, I will fail, but I don't think I'm in the right headspace for studying right now." - Anonymous

I see you might be a bit stressed over that right now. It's ok to be stressed over a test. It's normal. I would say right now, do something you know will help you destress. It could be meditating, doing a hobby, anything to help get your mind clear. Try to go back to studying once your mind is clear because forcing yourself to study when you're not in the right mindset might be as good as if you didn't study at all. If your teacher allows it, maybe try emailing them and let them know about your situation. Try asking if you could take it later. It doesn't hurt to try! You got this!



"I have the worst sleeping habits in the whole world. I know they're bad, but I don't have the motivation to fix it. I enjoy being awake during really late hours of the night, but it always leads me to sleeping through my alarms or feeling groggy in the morning. I always feel the most awake during these times and feel the happiest. I know I should fix it, but I haven't found a reason to. I would like to think I'm taking care of my health well, but with my sleeping problems, I don't think I am. Should I fix the thing that makes me happy?" - Anonymous

I see you're like an owl of the night! I see you say you have no motivation to try and fix your sleep schdule, but you've actually just wrote a reason! I don't know how important health is to you (I'm hoping a lot), but that is a perfect reason! I know it might seem really hard letting go of the happiest times in a day, but trust me. It will be worth it in the long run. You don't have to go all in at one time. You can do little by little. Maybe 30 minutes earlier each week until you land at a perfect medium? You don't have to start with a bang! If you're worried about it, why not fix it while you can so you can go on without that burden! You can do this and remember you're most definitely not alone on this! Baby steps are still steps!



"I'm a really big fan of many things and when I say big, I mean BIG. I've been told by my friends and family that I should "tone it down." I know that I can be a bit extreme at times, but I don't know how. I've found genuine happiness in the things I'm a fan of. From music groups to tv shows, I express my love a lot. I don't want to be a ruckus to the people around me, but I also don't want to give up the things that I love." - Anonymous

Being a huge fan of something; I have a lot of experience as well. I understand that you have so much love for these things that your heart bursts with love and appreciation right? It's ok. You're not alone. Right now, I want you to think about what you do when you see, listen, play, whatever you do to experience it. What do you do? Do you scream? Cry? Both? Or do you just do it peacefully? It's ok if you scream or cry, as long as no one is going to complain or has anything important going on, go right ahead, but still be mindful of the people around you ok? Emotions are natural. My best tip for you right now would be to make sure you don't let your emotions take over. I know sometimes that does happen, but if you catch yourself, stop, take a deep breath, and think about what's happening. If you think it is at an innappropriate time and place, then try your best to calm yourself down. It's ok to slip up a few times. We're only human. Try your best and I'm sure it'll work out!

"Right now, I don't feel like I am doing anything significant, and it seems that I am just not developing anything special. I have been doing the same thiings everyday, and they dont' feel meaningful enough to me. I want to know about the things that I can do to advance and develop myself because I am just not feeling that I am doing anything."- Anonymous

The first step to developing is to enrich your mindset. Your mind believes what you tell it, and if you tell yourself you can't do something, your mind will keep that mindset. So in order to feel that your achieving something you should feel positive and be confident about yourself. In order to know what you are doing, you need to realize your goals and what actions and work you are doing that is relevant to something significant, in this case it is your goals. So it is imperative that you do something that you truly enjoy because only then will you feel like your driven to that cause.

"My motivation and discipline has been very inconsistent and I am starting to lose confidence and feel bad about myself. I want to do the things that are useful to me and to keep it consistent but it is difficult to manage. What can I do to solve this issue"

The key to motivation and discipline is not to rely on your mood and to take action like it is a beneficial daily routine. The reason motivation isn't effective all the time is becaues it is mostly temporary and once the good mood is over so is the motivation. If you rely on discipline that is better because you are building good habits and you know it, but it is important to know that if results start happening quickly then that is actually bad. Good things that happen take time to develop and fake success will collapse. So understand that patience and consitentcy is important and that is the key.

I have trouble with resistance and procrastination which I resist the fear of doing something I don't want to do at the moment. This is a bad habit and I want to stop but I really can't. What are some of the daily practices that I can do to avoid this because I procrastinate more or less every day and I feel as if there is some kind of psychology behind it. Are there any tips and advice for this problematic habit?

Yes there definitely are ways to overcome procrastination. Once again, the main step to overcome bad habits like this are developing the mindset. The reason we procrastinate is because we resist the fear of doing something at a given moment and it is usually an important task that we neglect and procrastinate on. The fear of resistance builds up and we are aware that we want to wait before doing this and that we don't want to do it now. If you were to finish the task when you are supposed to, there will be less fear and more accomplishment. So there is a question I will leave you with, do you want to live feeling fear and resistance to something that you can accomplish, or do you want to step up, take action, and overcome the fear before it rules you?